This week we're taking a look back at one of our most requested topic: “Should you keep it, repair it, or toss it?”. We explore the emotional attachments we have to our belongings and the practical considerations that influence our decisions. We guide you through 3 essential questions to consider when deciding the fate of our items. From the sentimental to the practical, we will go over how to look at our belongings with a fresh perspective. Tune in for a dose of encouragement and practical tips. Let's get organized!
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Replay with a new intro and bonus tip. Original Episode 39 Air Date: October 16, 2023
In this episode we talk about:
- Guilt and remorse associated with buying things
- Exploring the question of whether to keep or let go of items
- Importance of Intentional Decision-Making
Mentioned in this Episode:
Episode 006: Should You Do It Yourself or Outsource It?
https://theorganizedflamingo.com/6-should-you-do-it-yourself-or-outsource-it/
Episode 016: Step 3: Decluttering Your home For a Happier You
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The Organized & Productive podcast is brought to you by The Organized Flamingo and hosted by Stephanie Y. Deininger! For those of you who love the thought of organizing & being more productive, but don’t know where to start or constantly up against hurdles that don’t let you advance the way you want to, this podcast is for you!
Review full show notes and resources at https://theorganizedflamingo.com/podcast
Join our weekly email newsletter for all-things organizing & productivity delivered right to your inbox https://theorganizedflamingo.com/quicklinks
Review the Transcript:
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:00:00]:
Hi, friends. Welcome to this week's episode. So this week, we do have a replay from last year, but we have a new intro. So I this is live. This is a new to this summer of 2024 intro, but the episode itself is still relevant, which most of our episodes are built that way and recorded that way so that whenever you need some encouragement about that topic that we're talking about, you can play it and find inspiration, get some ideas so that you can complete whatever it is that you're trying to finish. Maybe a project, maybe it's an emotional journey in your organizing decluttering downsizing journey. Maybe you are entering a new phase in life, so you need to address the issue about organizing that stuff or decluttering or selling it or figuring it out. So all of our episodes are stand alones with a couple, of course, that are, part 1 and part 2, which we label that way, but they're all stand alone subjects, and some of them play upon each other.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:01:03]:
And sometimes, I will bring them back like I am this week. And whenever I do bring back an episode from a previous season, it's because either the subject matter is becoming relevant again or I'm getting more questions and or clients or community members talking about the subject again, so I'm bringing that back, or it's a way for me to help you maintain and evaluate and kind of readdress and make sure that this is still relevant. So that's the category we're we're picking up on this week. So it's this episode is all about the should you keep it, repair it, or toss it. Every once in a while, I like to do check ins because life may have changed and your circumstances may have changed. So making sure that it's what you did the original time that you maybe decluttered or downsized or whatever the project was originally, making sure that you're still asking the questions that are relevant right now. And so that's what this episode is all about. Back when when we created this episode, it was all about asking yourself, should you keep it? Should you toss it? Should you, repair it? And we do have a decision tree that goes along with up this episode, which I'll put in the show notes, and it helps you just get familiar and practice the quick decision making that we, we are we don't normally we're not born with, and we normally don't exercise unless you're doing this all the time.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:02:36]:
So, you know, a little fun fact is that when decision making, like, the executive function of decision making, does need to be practiced. It needs to be learned. You're not born with it. You do make decisions, of course, in life, but if you're trying to make quick decisions and trust yourself with the decisions that you're making you do need to practice them and this applies when you're deciding about the stuff to keep or let go or like what do I do with it and when you don't do this enough you often will get stuck in the I'm not sure phase. And then all of a sudden, that's what creates the clutter because you're stuck. Like, there's no decision making and it just it doesn't even come. It doesn't go. You don't clean it.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:03:16]:
You don't repair it. You don't try to sell it, but you also are not enjoying it. So if you do keep it, it just kind of sits there. So that's what I'm trying to avoid with this episode and this refresh. I hope you enjoy it. Let us know your thoughts. As always, we are available for you. We're a phone call away on social media.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:03:35]:
Tag us. We'd love to cheer you on. And here we go. Picture this. You're standing in front of a closet in your house or your space. You're staring at a box filled with old belongings, but you know it's time to declutter that closet. And you know this because when you opened that closet, everything fell out, like it was busting at the seams. But the items in that closet, they hold memories and nostalgia.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:04:01]:
There are baby items in there that you wanted to use and you didn't. You wanted to wear and you didn't. And now you have guilt and you have the remorse that comes with buying things when you had intention of doing something about it. You wanted to give it as a gift. You wanted to wear it. So now you have gift. You have guilt associated with it. So today, we're going to dive deep into the age old question of, should you keep an item or let it go? When is it time to just finally let it go? Or is it worth keeping, maybe even repairing something you may not have thought of? So let's dive in and let me give you some of my thoughts as a professional organizer who's been doing this for over 20 years.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:04:43]:
So let's go. Welcome to the Organized and Productive podcast with the Organized Flamingo. I am your host, Stephanie, a professional organizer and productivity expert. Ready to explore the right organizing and productivity solutions for you? Yeah? Well, then let's go. Okay. So first things first is let's talk about why people decide to keep an item and why it's so hard to for them to let it go. You know, people choose to keep an item for a variety of reasons, the same way people decide to let go of an item for a variety of reasons. Right? So but most of the the most common is it's usually influenced by personal preferences.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:05:24]:
So it's really hard for you to let go of something because you really like it. It's it's who you are. It's your vibe and you it's a personal personal preference. Maybe it's a practical consideration. So you think, well, I don't love it, but I do use it all the time. And the others are emotional attachments. What I talked a little bit about earlier in the introduction where there might be a box of your, you know, old flowers from every dance that you went to in high school, or maybe letters from your pen pal best friend that lived, you know, that moved across the country or the world, and you're keeping all these letters. There's a lot of emotional attachment to things.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:06:06]:
Right? So it's those types of things. And then, of course, there's the items utility, which, there may be items that you do use all the time, kinda like the practical consideration. Like, well, it's, you know, I I should probably keep this because I do use it. But I don't love it. Or sometimes you do use it, but it's broken and you've been meaning to fix it. So that's all part of why we end up keeping things. Sometimes it, goes beyond that. So we're not really going to talk about kind of the, the hoarding aspect of it or the mental health piece of it, like the more of the, like OCD or hoarding.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:06:44]:
We will talk about that in a separate episode. So this is just more about everyday items and about the general feelings of why you can't let go of something. Now that we have talked about why we end up keeping things like a very general idea, like some of the reasons why we kept keep things. Let's talk about some questions that you can be asking yourself when you are faced with this dilemma of, oh, should I? Should I keep it? Now in our world at the Organized Flamingo in our organizing world, we like to give you options. That's actually how this podcast started because I, we believe that there's not enough options for people. It's always this or that there's only 2, you know, go extreme, do one extreme to the other. And I do believe that there are, there's a middle ground, especially when it comes to letting go of your things, both digital and physical things, there is a gray area, but I don't think we give enough thought process to the gray area to make, intentional decisions about our stuff. And so we get stuck.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:07:46]:
And I think that's kind of where we end up getting stuck with keeping too many things. So my hope for this particular episode is this is living under the category of the decluttering phase, which you can I will put in the show notes and you can refer back to that episode of where we talk about the decluttering phase? So this is a subset of that. It's when you are ready to declutter and let go. What are, what are some things that you should consider that are not always about just throwing it away or just donating it or just letting it like having it be gone from your space. I mean, that is a very practical way to just finally minimize and and get some of that weight off your shoulders. I am an a big advocate of sometimes you just have to go big or go home. I I I agree. But that doesn't work for everyone, and that can actually be the opposite of a of the answer.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:08:41]:
That could give you trauma that you especially if you're not ready to let go and you just did it out of being impulsive. You can come back to the same habits if you don't understand why and how you got to that place to begin with. So I like to give you tools and questions to ponder along the process of your organizing journey. And that's what we're doing today. So I'm going to give you some questions for you to think about when you are determining whether you should keep an item or not. This also is a great, we have a quiz that go that it's, like a check-in quiz where you put in the item that you're thinking about keeping or letting go, or you're struggling. You do you're not sure. You're like 50.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:09:22]:
You're in the middle, like 5050. So there's a quiz in our show notes that you can head over to, and then it will guide you through what we think based on what your input and your answers were, what we think you should do or or something, or some of the considerations we would give you if you were asking us in person. So this is as the best I could do for all of you when we can't always be in person or where we can't always necessarily be doing the service for you. This is a DIY option. It's almost like we're there with you and you can do it at the comfort and privacy of your own home. Maybe you're not ready to hire a professional organizer to be in your space. It's too personal. This quiz will be great.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:10:02]:
Or it's like a little check-in, about, Hey, I wanted to declutter, but I'm not ready. What do you think I should do with this item? So head on over to the show notes to take that quiz and, I hope you like it. So let's get to our questions that I love for you to consider when you're thinking about keeping an an item or letting it go. So here we go. The 3 questions I want you to consider are these, and then we'll go into details with each of these. The first is, do you love this item? The second is, do you use this item? The third is, does this item need to be repaired? So let's talk about the first question. Do you love this item? And I mean love this item. Okay? I am emphasizing the word love here.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:10:48]:
Is there an emotional connection to this item? That's the question I want you to ask. And you may be saying, well, yes. Duh. That is why I'm keeping all this stuff. Okay. Well, fine. But let me lead you to the next question. Do you use this item? So you may love an item.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:11:05]:
I mean, with all your heart. It's been part of you since you were in kindergarten. This is the one, you know, box that has helped you through all these, you know, emotional or life changes. Whatever the reason may be, you're keeping it. Great. Or may it it you know what? And sometimes the love piece, it is emotional, but it doesn't have to be super deep. It could be, especially for all of you who are crafters, maybe you have holiday items. You have your holiday mugs.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:11:33]:
You have your holiday decor. You love it. Okay. Great. But this is where we lead to the next question. But do you use this item? It's great that you love it, but do you use it? And this question of the the use that it could be on an everyday basis. It can be on a yearly basis, especially if it is the seasonal items. Obviously, those will probably only come out once a year or maybe every couple of years.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:11:58]:
But do you use it if you're answering no to? Yeah, I love it, but I never use it. You know, this is something for you to think about. You know, does it does it feel funny when you're saying, yeah, I love it, but I really use it. So you start to feel and you understand why these questions will guide you to slowly detaching yourself from an item. You could also not love an item. You're like, not really. I don't love it at all, but I use it every day. And this is where the next question comes in.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:12:32]:
Does this item need to be repaired? This is the question of, especially, you know, kitchen garage, like a lot of the utility type of items that I I see a lot of people hang on to, but it's broken or they use it so much that now it doesn't really work the way it used to. And it actually doubles the work that you're trying to do. You know, you probably need a new one now, and it's time to let that one go. So I'm gonna have you answer the 3 questions for each item though. So let's talk let's go with a specific example of a hammer. Super general, you know, hammer is something that we most households, most people have in their space because it's something that, you know, helps you with whatever you're you're working on. Even if you're not a DIYer or you're a handy person, you probably, at some point, have had to use a hammer. Right? So you have one.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:13:27]:
Great. Do you love this item? Yes or no? Maybe let's let's use the no as the example here. Not really. You're not a DIYer. You're not super handy. Not not really. But do you use this item? Probably for the reasons I just explained. But what it for whatever reason in your in your space, in your house, you probably needed a hammer.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:13:45]:
So, yes, does this item need to be repaired? That question is sometimes doesn't get asked in the process. Meaning. Great. Fine. So then yes, you keep it. Right? You don't love this item, but you need it. So you keep it. But sometimes we keep things that need to be discarded, and it's time to let it go.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:14:03]:
Maybe this is a hammer that just doesn't even work anymore. The handle came off. You're taping it, and, you know, it doesn't even doesn't help anymore. So maybe that's time for you to let it go. And what happens with this last question, does this item need to be repaired, is people will then buy a new one because the old one broke or it doesn't you can't use it the way it was intended to be used anymore, but you keep it because it kind of works. So now you have the old one and you have a new one. So now you have 2 of the same thing, and slowly but surely, it starts to accumulate. That's just for one item.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:14:40]:
But imagine imagine having to go through this process with all of your different things. Maybe you have duplicates or 3 or 4 because you never, you never thought about, Hey, I should probably just let go of the original item that I set to replace, if that makes sense. So those are the 3 questions that I want you to ask yourself with each of the items that I, you know, specific like items. So this isn't like an overall question. This isn't about, do you love this item? Like everything in your closet, this you need to hold one piece of item, the item you're contemplating, keeping or not, and go through these questions. I'd like to dive in a little bit deeper into the last question that I have over 3 questions, which is, does this item need to be repaired? As I mentioned earlier, I just don't think it it gets asked enough when it comes to making our ultimate decision of keeping an item. There's a couple of outcomes that will happen when you are answering all of these questions, but especially with the repair, does it need to be repaired? Question. Some of those, some of those outcomes will be, yes, it needs to be repaired, but I don't want to, or it's, too much of a hassle.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:15:51]:
It costs too much money. This is especially true with shoes. Many people will keep their shoes with the intention of repairing them because they have some sentimental, connection with them or they were just beautiful shoes or or designer shoes, very expensive shoes, and, or they're part of a collection. If you if you collect a certain type of brand of shoe and you keep these because you intend to repair it, well, great. But if you don't have the time to repair it or it's too much money, that is a question you will be answering as well. We actually have an episode that is all about, should you keep it or should you do it yourself? That episode will help you determine, okay, is it worth me, hiring a professional, or is it worth me doing it myself? Other questions for you to consider. But going back to the repair question, I I don't think that this question gets asked enough. I think sometimes we just get so in the moment of decluttering of this phase where we just throw it away, and then we just come back to to replacing that item.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:16:53]:
But then we go right back to misusing the item or we don't even we didn't even like it to begin with. So we bought another one. Why did we buy another one if we didn't like it to begin with? This is especially true with clothing. This is especially true with, some of those items in your kitchen, like your kitchen gadgets that you think you need, but you don't really use it or love it. So why are you buying it again? And you just think you need to, especially with spices. Spice is a big example. When I see people buying the whole, every spice in the out there because they think they need it in their kitchen, but then it starts to go bad after a couple years. And, I mean, even if it doesn't go bad, it's just taking up space.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:17:35]:
So do you really need the whole collection of all the spices that you don't even like to use that you don't use? Probably not. Right? So these are the questions that that this is kind of what I'm talking about. Like, making sure that these are the items that, you actually will be using. Okay. So going back to the repair. Okay. Now that I went on that tangent, but let's go back to the repair. I think sometimes we just don't think about well, maybe it is worth me repairing.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:18:00]:
I like this item enough. Again, we're going back to the shoes, especially shoes and clothing, or or making it fit to your current fit, so getting it tailored. It might be worth you getting it fixed, getting new soles, get getting that hole on the shoe fixed or the or new, you know, whatever it may be just to make it better instead of going out and buying something new and adding more to the pile of stuff. And and and so actually using the item that you wanted to repair. So those are the those are the things that I want you to consider. Okay. Now that I've rambled on a little bit about that, I'm just very passionate about the it might be worth repairing. It actually might be worth it.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:18:40]:
So that stuff doesn't keep piling up. But again, it doesn't apply to everybody and it and everything. So just make sure you head on over to the quiz, take the quiz, see if it's worth it. Read a little bit more about, is it worth repairing on our blog post, that is also part of the quiz. So is there an item that you're thinking about right now as I went through this episode? Is there that one box or these, maybe a list of items that you would love that you're stuck on and you would love a little bit help figuring out if you should keep it or let it go? Yeah? Well, let us know. I'd love to cheer you on and help you make that decision. I think you can, of course, do it yourself. I don't think you need someone to always hand hold you, but I do think that sometimes we get so stuck in our head that we overthink why we're keeping an item.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:19:32]:
So I hope that this quiz, that this episode, and that when we have these conversations, it will inspire you to take that extra step, to take the next step of making a definite decision. So you're not stuck in this limbo all the time of, I don't know of the what ifs when it comes to your stuff. So as always, cheering you on and happy organizing. Until next time. Thank you for listening to the Organized and Productive podcast with The Organized Flamingo. If you enjoyed today's episode, I would love it if you'd leave a rating and review on your favorite podcast player. It helps with letting people know that we're here. For full show notes and resources, head on over to the organizedflamingo.com/podcast.
Stephanie Y. Deininger [00:20:15]:
Happy organizing.
