In the ever-evolving journey of life, certain life phases have always been present—marriage, divorce, moves, parenthood, and caring for aging parents. The Sandwich Generation, individuals caught between the responsibilities of living their own life, and caring for their children as well as their parents, is not a new phenomenon. However, it has become more complicated in our modern world. In this blog post, we'll delve into the challenges faced by the Sandwich Generation, focusing on how it relates to the physical stuff they manage and the importance of mindful decluttering when navigating this intricate balance.
The Traditional Responsibilities of the Sandwich Generation
Historically, the Sandwich Generation has existed, with individuals finding themselves “sandwiched” between caring for their aging parents and raising their own children or other loved ones. In earlier times, the challenges were there, but the complexities we face today, especially concerning physical possessions, have added a new layer to this age-old responsibility.
I should note here that the Sandwich Generation terms (because there are a few terms that branch off the main term) were introduced in the social term in 1981 and were added to the Webster's Dictionary in 2006. This blog post does not focus on the history of this generation but I thought it was important to note.
It's more than just “stuff”: The complexities the Sandwich Generation faces today
As we navigate the 21st century, the concept of the Sandwich Generation has evolved. Now, more than ever, it's about managing not just the emotional and financial aspects but also the sheer volume of physical possessions. With an abundance of “stuff” to handle—from family heirlooms to children's toys and everything in between—organizing has become an integral part of successfully navigating this challenging phase. There is:
- Multiplication of Possessions: In our modern world, possessions seem to multiply. Aging parents may have accumulated a lifetime of belongings, and raising children in a consumer-driven society means a constant influx of toys, gadgets, and clothing. Managing this accumulation is a significant challenge for the Sandwich Generation.
- Emotional Attachments: Possessions are not just objects; they carry emotional weight. Family heirlooms, childhood mementos, and sentimental items can clutter spaces, yes, but they are part of who we are. Deciding what to keep, what to pass on, and what to let go becomes a delicate task, requiring emotional discussions and thoughtful decisions.
- Time Constraints: Juggling caregiving responsibilities with careers and personal lives leaves the Sandwich Generation with limited time. The need for efficient organization becomes paramount to avoid chaos in the face of already overwhelming responsibilities.
How to make it less overwhelming
Having been in this profession for more than two decades, I can confidently say that the top emotions that contribute to the overwhelm of the Sandwich Generation and anyone having to deal with stuff that wasn't theirs are guilt and exhaustion (there are other emotions tied to the overwhelm but these are the roadblocks before taking any meaningful action).
Here are a few tips I have for you to reduce the overwhelm, guilt, and exhaustion and instead find peace and relief.
- Create a plan. Please don't miss this step. Assess how you are feeling and talk about your end goals. We have a full episode on our Organized & Productive Podcast exactly about how to create a plan and assess your organizing journey and projects. Episode 001: 7 Steps to Organizing *Almost* Anything gives you an overview and Episode 008: Step 1: Assess. The Power of Planning Ahead provides more detail on how to assess a project before you start.
- Boundaries. It can be really easy to want to keep everything in your space, but that just adds to the clutter. Without boundaries, you will get stuck in the clutter. Give yourself clear boundaries of how much stuff you can keep and how much attention you are willing to give to these items. Think about the storage fees, the cleaning efforts, and anything else that comes with keeping things (especially vintage and antique items). Boundaries are what will give you peace in the long run.
- Decide what is worth DIYing or Outsourcing. We have a great episode on this titled Episode 006: Should You Outsource or Do It Yourself? which gives you some questions to ask yourself when trying to decide if it's worth outsourcing or doing it yourself. If anything, at least think about this question and make sure that you are thinking about how much it will cost, do you want to do it or it best someone else takes care of it, how much you want to get involved, and how much time it will take.
- Bonus: if you have not processed the heavy emotions that come with acquiring clutter and physical stuff that wasn't yours, I would encourage you to see a mental health professional who specializes in these fields. Many pro organizers have the skills and training to coach you but make sure you tell them the emotional attachment is something you need help with.
The Sandwich Generation has always existed, but in the complexity of the modern world, the challenges have intensified. Navigating this phase requires a thoughtful approach to managing not only emotional and financial aspects but also the accumulated physical possessions. At The Organized Flamingo, as well as other pro organizers around the world, guide individuals in decluttering with purpose and heart. We create organized living spaces amidst the overwhelm. If you find yourself in this position, I see you and hope you have found a space within The Organized Flamingo where you feel seen and heard. What question can we answer that will help you through this process? Send us a note or comment here and let's work through this together.
Stephanie Y. Deininger, CPO®, MBA
Pro Organizer & Founder | The Organized Flamingo
